Run For Your Furry Life
by Paigeriffic
Summary: Someone is hunting Kit, someone wants her dead. That someone is in The Manor and will stop at nothing to achieve her goal.
1. Ding Ding! Round One

"Piper, do we have any black paint?" Asked Phoebe, as she innocently tip-toed into the kitchen.  
  
"Why? What do you want it for?" Replied Piper, a nervous look on her face. When Phoebe asked for random things it usually had a bad outcome.  
  
"Oh... you know. The usual." Phoebe said casually opening cupboards and searching in drawers.  
  
"No, no I don't know. What is the usual?" Piper's hand closed around her rolling pin and she held it tensely, ready to strike out at Phoebe.  
  
Phoebe narrowed her eyes and looked around suspicously. "Can you keep a secret? Its really, *really* important."  
  
Piper sighed and nodded, she knew this was going to be 'one of those Phoebe moments'.  
  
"Ok," Phoebe tip-toed over and began whispering in Piper's ear. "War Paint... hunting... need weapons... deadly animals... Manor in danger." She finally finished and looked expectantly at Piper.  
  
Her older sister pushed her off and wiped her ear. "Are you crazy? Gah, stupid question Piper. Listen Phoebe, I don't want to know about anymore of your crazy schemes, just use some chocolate mousse and get the hell out of my kitchen. And make sure you don't break anything!"  
  
Phoebe went to the fridge and opened a small pot of chocolate mousse. With a grave look she smeared it on her face, like the war paint of a warrior, and bared her teeth. "I've got a Kit to catch." She stopped baring her teeth and began to lick the mousse off her fingers.  
  
Piper sighed again and went upstairs.  
  
* * *  
  
Kit moved moved fast and kept against the wall. She knew that Phoebe would be coming soon, she had to get ready.  
  
There was a loud clomping down the hall and Kit jumped, darting through the door at the end of the hall.  
  
Phoebe leapt forwards and grabbed a small pair of scissors off the small table. Without pausing she threw them at the doorway.   
  
There was a muffled hiss and the sound of frantic claws scrabbling away.  
  
"DAMN IT!" Screamed Phoebe, as she bounced forwards on all fours, trying to get a 'Kits eye veiw' of The Manor. "I have to get Kit before she gets me... or all hell will break loose!"  
  
A picture of Prue suddenly began to shake and then fell off the wall...smashing on Phoebe's head. She brushed the glass out of her hair and stared down at the picture of Prue. She could have sworn it was smirking slightly.  
  
"Phoebe! What did I say about breaking things? Oh my god! You broke a Prue picture! Sacrilege!" She threw up her hands and blew the floor up underneath Phoebe.   
  
Phoebe fell through and landed with a crash. Kit peeked round the door and sniggered. Good old Prue, getting Phoebe from beyond the grave. There was a creaking coming from under the house, Kit looked down nervously and saw a sharp blade poking up through the floor boards and stabbing at her.  
  
Phoebe looped up and randomly stabbed her knife upwards. She'd get Kit eventually, she was sure of it.   
  
Kit stood up on her hind legs and jumped, hooking her claws onto the wall and slowly edging along, pausing to catch her breath every few feet.  
  
A spider landed on Phoebe's head and she began to scream, frantically hitting herself with a plank of wood to get it off. The spider giggled and jumped back into the shadows. Phoebe, being completely oblivious, carried on hitting. Eventually she stopped and climbed back up through the hole, furtively looking around for Kit.  
  
Kit stopped and nervously held her breath.  
  
Phoebe sniffed and looked up and down the hall. Kit was close, she could smell her. She kicked the wall with frustration and screamed.  
  
The kick jolted Kit off the wall. With a miaow of terror she plummeted down and landed squarely on Phoebe's head.  
  
Phoebe felt the claws tighten on her head and squealed, her hands groping around for something to hit her head with.   
  
Kit screamed with fright and whipped her tail around, its furry length slapping Phoebe's back.  
  
The whipping on her back made Phoebe run forwards, blinding careening into furniture and walls. She tripped over a chair and fell onto the floor.   
  
Kit flew off Phoebe's head and went spinning towards the front door... which opened. Paige walked in and Kit conveniently landed in her arms.  
  
"Whoa! Aww Kit. Poor kitty, whats the matter?" Paige said soothingly, as she stroked Kit's bristling fur.  
  
Phoebe jumped to her feet and hastily checked her chocolate mousse war markings. "Give me the Kit, Paige, and no one gets hurt." She said as commandingly as possible.  
  
Kit nuzzled Paige and smirked at Phoebe as Paige held her tighter. "No way you lunatic. How do I know you won't eat her or kill her. Hey, is that chocolate mousse?"  
  
Phoebe paused, slowly licking her fingers. "Yes, yes it is. I repeat, give me Kit."  
  
"Never! I''ll never let you take her!" Screamed Paige defiantly, putting Kit behind her back.   
  
Kit poked her head over Paige's shoulder and daintily poked her small pink tongue out.  
  
Phoebe patted her face and then leapt upwards, using the sticky chocolate mousse to stick to the wall. She swung along and dropped down behind Paige, grabbing at Kit.   
  
Paige flinched and orbed out, as Kit jumped up and hung in the air, Matrix style. She slowly spun and then kicked Phoebe in the head and then swung round, catching her with a sharp uppercut... scoring a line of blood along Phoebe's face. Kit dropped out of 'Matrix mode' and scampered away.  
  
Phoebe fell back, reeling from Kit's attack. She gingerly felt her face and muttered. "This is not over."  
  
  
a/n, kerazy no? Well theres more where that came from... ok well there isn't because I haven't written anymore yet. BUT there will be... eventually. 


	2. Round Two

Kit casually strolled into the kitchen and made her way over to the litter tray. She surveyed the kitchen to see if anyone was about (she is a very modest cat), and on seeing no one, squatted carefully over the cat litter.  
  
Suddenly a hand reached out of the sandy filling of the tray and grabbed Kit's slowly swaying tail.  
  
Kit yowled and shot into the air, the hand was dragged out after it, revealing a hairy arm... then a badly designed shit sleeve and then... Phoebe's head!  
  
"I told you this wasn't over! I will get you this time, you miserable cat!" Screamed Phoebe as she coughed and spat cat litter out of her mouth.  
  
A young girl popped up from behind the counter. "Did someone say 'miserable brat'?" She asked, in a mischevious voice.  
  
Phoebe looked cofused and let go of Kit's tail for a second. "I don't think I did. What are you doing here?"   
  
The girl giggled and picked up a whip. "I'm going to do some mischeif for fun." With that she scampered off to do some mischeif for fun.  
  
Phoebe shrugged and looked at her sticky hands. Kit was gone! "Arrrrrgh! One day I'll get that cat... and that day will be a joyous day indeed!" She picked up a knife and held it in a heroic pose.  
  
Piper chose that moment to walk into the kitchen. She saw Phoebe standing in the litter box holding a knife above her head and attempting to do a heroic look. It would have worked if it weren't for the cat litter stuck to the old chocolate mousse that still plastered her face.  
  
"What are you... I. No. I give up." She sighed and walked out of the room with a defeated look.  
  
"All the more booty... I mean, bounty for me." She put the knife into her belt and scampered after Kit.  
  
Meanwhile in the attic, Kit was frantically flicking through the Book of Shadows. There was nothing she could use to fend off Phoebe... unless. Kit smiled and pulled a length of rope out of her... hair?  
  
Phoebe sniffed the ground and tried to get Kit's trail. "Aha!" She put her nose to the ground and crawled along, making enthusiastic sniffing sounds.   
  
Paige walked through a door and saw Phoebe sniffing her way towards her. With a shriek she slammed it shut and ran off.  
  
Phoebe crawled into the door and banged her head on the hard wooden frame. She sat up and fell over backwards. She rolled into a small table and knocked the cordless phone off. It landed on her head and fell to the ground, somehow triggering auto-dial.  
  
A voice spoke on the other end. "Hello, Prudential Insurance. How may we help you?"  
  
Phoebe recoiled from the phone, her eyes wide with shock. With a trembling hand she reached over and pulled the phone up to her ear. "Prue? Is it really you?"  
  
The voice on the other end sounded slightly puzzled. "Yes, this is the Pru. Are you interested in purchasing insurance?"  
  
"Insurance? But you died... didn't you?" Phoebe was staring at the phone as if it were a ghost.  
  
"Not that I know of, would you like to order a brochure?" The voice continued in an unsure manner.  
  
"No, I want to catch the cat named Kit." Phoebe answered brightly. "I think I heard her upstairs, bye Prue." She turned the phone off and threw it on the floor.  
  
Kit finished tying a knot just as Phoebe came clomping up the stairs. She ran over to the middle of the attic and sat down, calmly washing her ears.  
  
Phoebe opened the attic door and saw Kit in the middle of the attic, calmly washing her ears. "Aha, my elusive foe. We meet at last."  
  
Kit gave Phoebe a confused look and wondered if Phoebe remembered they'd seen each other a few minutes ago.  
  
"And now you shall meet your fate... Phoebe style!" She walked forwards and pulled the knife out her belt, a bizarre expression on her face. It was a kind of mix between happy and psychotic... but the overall effect was disturbing.  
  
Kit watched intently as Phoebe stepped on the carefully prepared trap. With a miaow of joy she watched as Phoebe triggered her trap.  
  
Phoebe's foot touched a pink mat. The mat was pressure sensitive and almost immediately reacted.  
  
An anvil fell from the roof and hit Phoebe on the head, with a loud "clang". She looked dazed for a second and then shrugged it off.   
  
HOWever, the rope attatched to the anvil was tied to the Book of Shadows as well. When the anvil fell the book's rope was pulled taught and the Book of Shadows flew the air and hit Phoebe in the face. She was knocked backwards and out of the door.  
  
Piper and Paige were putting on their coats in the hall when they saw, and heard, Phoebe tumbling down the attic stairs... the Book of Shadows stuck to the chocolate mousse on her face.  
  
Paige opened her mouth to comment but Piper stopped her. "Don't ask, just go, come on." She turned to shut the door and shuddered.  
  
Kit stood at the top of the stairs and looked down at Phoebe. Today had been a good day. With a satisfied purr she jumped down and padded softly into the kitchen to finish her previously disturbed 'business'.  
  
  
a/n, Prudential insurance is an actual company in England, maybe everywhere else as well, so I just thought I'd point it out :).   
a/n, Tune in next time to see if Phoebe will actually be able to outsmart Kit... Pfft, like thats ever gonna happen. 


End file.
